Sad Cat Diary

  • Published on May 8, 2013
  • The diary of sad cats everywhere :(
    Tweet This :: (you can add text !)
    Post To FB :: on. 19wNCLy
    Music :
    Inspired by :
    (i am also the EVP of video for Buzzfeed)
    Credits ::
    Film Footage courtesy of Shutterstock, Inc., Used by Permission
    Watering the Cat (bowl)/Kiwithing
    Closeup portrait photo of a CPA cat looking out through a window/Xiaojiao Wang
    Poor lonely kitten lays on the floor waiting for his friends to come back/Xiaojiao Wang
    Closeup portrait photo of a CPA cat looking out through a window/Xiaojiao Wang
    Silver Persian kitten hiding in a paperbag./Jane Howard
    scotitish fold grey cat/5464316719
  • EntertainmentEntertainment

Comments • 9 306

  • _B1itzkri3g
    _B1itzkri3g 2 years ago +10520

    So apparently dogs write like scientists while cats write like prisoners of war

    • frogsoda
      frogsoda 14 days ago

      Sounds about right.

    • Jellied Osprey
      Jellied Osprey Month ago


    • Samcaracha
      Samcaracha 2 months ago

      Both do. Listen ;)

    • The Fake Antichrist
      The Fake Antichrist 5 months ago

      Omg you are so write

      JERRY RICHBURG 7 months ago

      There life is a miserable chain of events. only overshadowed by our miserable chain of idiocy. My cats use the dog door. They come inside to check on me, and sleep.

  • Dr Bright
    Dr Bright 2 years ago +2671

    My absolute favorite part of this video is the fact that, it’s counterpart, Sad Dog Diary, refers to the people as “dearest human”, whereas this one refers to them as “the authorities”. It’s perfect. Very accurate.

    • Dr Bright
      Dr Bright 3 months ago

      @DerKaiser Apparently having something similar to say automatically means you're "copying" now, cool.

    • DerKaiser
      DerKaiser 3 months ago

      Oh you just copied What Fezzik1620 said but made it a bit longer.

    • Maine weather timelapses
      Maine weather timelapses 7 months ago

      Dr bright has a cat ever worn your jewl or whatever iy is that makes you immortal? What happened

    • MikehMike01
      MikehMike01 10 months ago +3

      @kerryedavis no

    • RangerLeaf
      RangerLeaf Year ago +16

      Dr Bright the 05 Counsel states that the use of Foundation Equipment for TheXvid is a gross misuse of valuable resources
      However Cat videos must be watched in the name of science

  • Lindsey Tabaczynski
    Lindsey Tabaczynski 2 years ago +2188

    Can we get some "Quarantined Cat Diaries"?!?!? I could really use a laugh at this point.

    • Courtney
      Courtney 2 months ago

      @David Poland 🤣🤣🤣🤣😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

    • Courtney
      Courtney 2 months ago

      @Prophet of Greyism LMFAOOOOOOO

    • 216trixie
      216trixie 5 months ago

      Wasn't this video funny enough for you?

    • Zach Hogan
      Zach Hogan 8 months ago

      We can and have only it was called Pets During Quarantine and had more than just cats. Also Shrimp is apparently writing the great American detective noire novel and it sounds amazing

  • Eyes of a Tragedy
    Eyes of a Tragedy 2 years ago +291

    Dear Diary. I made a great effort today to catch a small mouse. It took an hour. I wanted to show the authorities my trophy and let them see I am willing to carry my own weight around here and provide food.
    Alas, they took my hard-won trophy and placed it in the garbage. It’s just like the hairballs I give... they appreciate nothing I do

    • J.J.
      J.J. 17 days ago +1

      My spirit is breaking

    • humblejo130
      humblejo130 21 day ago


    • Scratchy157
      Scratchy157 8 months ago +4

      Id put a crying emoji but im not a 14 yr old girl who uses tik tok

  • mandalorebard
    mandalorebard 4 years ago +3690

    As a owner of five cats, this is accurate.

    • Queen Paranormal
      Queen Paranormal 16 days ago

      As a butler to 9, with one having gone over the rainbow bridge, I concur.

    • Benjamin Riechert
      Benjamin Riechert 2 years ago

      I agree. I own two cats

    • catmint
      catmint 2 years ago


    • jereth oster
      jereth oster 2 years ago

      @aniq khairul my girl kitty has cat anxiety and we have a dog that likes to bite cats soooo that's a big problem, the other cat is really fat and demands all the food, he likes to knock things over and we have a dog so I had to say bye to my necklace! (Sorry I'm still mad about that) PLUS we have 2 praying mantises and the cats think meh mantises are food so when we take them out it's like a race to see who can eat then first. But you probably have it worse soooo I'm gonna stop

    • aniq khairul
      aniq khairul 2 years ago

      They and do

  • Lapis Lazarus
    Lapis Lazarus Year ago +548

    "I will stand guard and sing the song of my people...""

    • Anna Rose
      Anna Rose 7 days ago

      Yep, that's my Bolt. 😂😂😂😂😂

    • humblejo130
      humblejo130 21 day ago


    • Lilith Oomen
      Lilith Oomen 7 months ago


    • ba doem
      ba doem 10 months ago +9

      @nostalkingzone let's go, stay strong brothers. We shall stay strong on this last mile, rise you're tail and show them you're ass. We shall not be silenced on route to the final destination, I'll stay on the look for you

  • CapriiSunss
    CapriiSunss 2 years ago +3527

    “Half of love is just ... lo. And that is how I’m feeling.”
    Dangggg nice 👍

    • Patricia W.
      Patricia W. 2 months ago +1

      ..."My spirit is breaking."

    • Misty's gaming channel
      Misty's gaming channel 11 months ago

      When ur up to that part in the vid but reading comments 🤣

    • Danae
      Danae Year ago +6

      Poetic gold

    • Tim s
      Tim s Year ago +9

      I've watched this so many times and never noticed that, tyvm

    • Sam. A.K
      Sam. A.K 2 years ago +15

      @LEAVE ME ALONE half of love means the lo without the ve,

  • MisaWeasel
    MisaWeasel Year ago +64

    My cat was put down today. This offered me some humor when I needed it most. Thank you.

    • Shanda E
      Shanda E 5 months ago +1

      I'm so sorry for your loss. 😥

    • nostalkingzone
      nostalkingzone 9 months ago +3

      I would suggest trying "Cat Lullabye" by Dr. Moolton; but it's kind of sad. My condolences to you.

    • Doge gaming
      Doge gaming Year ago +2

      F for you cat F

  • eatyourlemons
    eatyourlemons 2 years ago +1423

    Every time something inconvenient happens to me my automatic response is “Like Sisyphus I am bound to Hell”

    • LadyMidnight
      LadyMidnight 6 months ago +2

      I said this tonight about how much I don’t like taking out the trash lmfao had to look up where it was from thinking it must be a famous line in a movie. Nope, sad cat diary.

    • Florian Haydn
      Florian Haydn 7 months ago

      We must imagine Sisyphus happy.

    • Cliche Guevara
      Cliche Guevara 11 months ago +1

      Same 😂

    • Jace White
      Jace White Year ago +11

      Sisyphean is my favorite word

    • Globex
      Globex Year ago

      Uploading a video when?

  • J M
    J M 5 years ago +6162

    His voice is the voice cats actually have inside their head. It has to be.

    • Jeff Slaughter
      Jeff Slaughter 2 months ago

      it's canon now, all cats, girl or boy, have this voice in their head

    • GcatMSGC
      GcatMSGC 3 months ago

      Except when they are queens

    • J M
      J M Year ago +2

      @Live Life "kitten cats" ....interesting.

    • Live Life
      Live Life Year ago

      @J M actually they do have thumbs they just don't bend or move, they can only retract claws

  • Sir Quaffler
    Sir Quaffler 2 years ago +2347

    Dear Diary,
    The continuing antics of the authorities continue to vex me. I have made repeated attempts to establish proper sleeping positions on the bed but, in a show of sheer arrogance and spite, they have continually ousted me from my proper place at the center and insisted I rest at the foot of it, after they tuck in. The nerve. Out of desperation I enacted a last-ditch effort to plead my case by sitting on the authorities' faces last night. They threw me out of the room. I am now forced to sleep on the couch like a common beggar. My spirit is breaking.

  • Eric Bussman
    Eric Bussman 2 years ago +135

    That's one of the best cat vids I've ever seen. It's just perfect. The language, syntax, everything. Sounds just like a cat would to me. Awesome job! This deserves a million likes!!

    • Judy F
      Judy F Year ago

      And the facial Expressions match perfectly...this was just brilliant

  • Orcinus1967
    Orcinus1967 2 years ago +248

    I want "I am convinced they are madmen, devoid of reason" as a ringtone.

  • Tyler Bessette
    Tyler Bessette 2 years ago +428

    My mother showed me this year's ago and we could never find it again. Can't wait to show her.

    • ele phanty
      ele phanty 2 years ago +3

      how did she like it again?! :)

    • Jackie K
      Jackie K 2 years ago +3


    • KMF 3000
      KMF 3000 2 years ago +16

      You should see his new one: Cats in Therapy. 🤣

  • fezzik1620
    fezzik1620 5 years ago +6035

    One of my favorite parts is that sad cat refers to "the authorities" whereas sad dog refers to "dearest human".

    • fezzik1620
      fezzik1620 6 months ago

      @huckfead Nope. Not that I recall; as you say, it's been 4 years. I think it's just a case of 2 different people noticed the same thing.

    • huckfead
      huckfead 6 months ago

      It’s taken 4 years but I’m here to point out that you stole this comment from a person on the sad dog diaries

    • Ginny Murray
      Ginny Murray 7 months ago

      That was my favorite too!

    • Sam Phelps
      Sam Phelps 9 months ago +1

      And the sisyphus refrence

    • Danny Kennedy
      Danny Kennedy Year ago

      I’m sayin

  • Gandalfsbigbeard
    Gandalfsbigbeard 2 years ago +267

    Dear Diary,
    For weeks there have been whispers of a “diet,” and today it finally happened. I was given half-rations and I no longer have the energy to move more than 2 feet from my bowl. The road to perdition is much shorter than I thought.

    • Kalvon
      Kalvon 10 months ago +6

      ...This wasn't enough I might die soon, so I have to go to this so call "Trashcan" because the authorities often threw food in there.

  • Marcelo Rodrigues
    Marcelo Rodrigues Year ago +27

    Dear diary, I have decided to place a request for Them to make sequels to the sad pet diary videos. It has been over 7 years and I do believe it's past the time to continue this obviously unfinished saga... Now I can only hope that my plead does not fall on deaf ears or hateful souls... Here goes nothing... may fate smile upon us...

  • 06hatter
    06hatter 2 years ago +1111

    "There is no logic in this place" same, sad cat, same

    • Zach Hogan
      Zach Hogan 10 months ago +1

      @MLBlue30 most Conservatives live is a fragile bubble of lies that 5 minutes on the web would show them is nothing but lies. The same is not true of anyone else, don't pretend otherwise to make yourself feel better about falsely being "above" politics.

    • Zach Hogan
      Zach Hogan 10 months ago +1

      @J Sav I mean literally everything you posted in this thread is not just a lie, but an easily disproven one. Stop listening to liars like Tucker Carlson and Sean Hannity, they are not your friends.

    • MLBlue30
      MLBlue30 Year ago

      @antipsychotic True, but who gets to decide who is smart or stupid? Everyone has their own precious opinion.

  • Nom Nom Nom
    Nom Nom Nom Year ago +9

    My cat sings The Song of His People all day and night 😭

  • Jenna Smith
    Jenna Smith Year ago +102

    Dear Diary,
    For the past two months I have refused to eat nothing but turkey and giblets wet food, to the point where the authorities have stockpiled an enormous amount of it in the locked food room. Now, as per etiquette, I have decided I will not to eat the turkey and insist that I will eat only beef. Yet the authorities continue to supply me with the vile turkey mess. Apparently my culture means nothing to them, and so I'm afraid I shall never eat again.

  • JumpWx
    JumpWx Year ago +5

    This was one of my stepmother’s favorite videos, she would always play this on the way to school, she passed away on Tuesday at the age of 36. R.I.P

  • Mary Cage
    Mary Cage 3 years ago +44

    Dear Diary: The Old Lady that loves me and calls me "Tweetums," (ugh) does not like for me to give her massages, but I cannot stop, since it is my way of showing my appreciation for the things she does for me. She complains that the needles in my paws hurt, but she has got to accept that sometimes LOVE hurts.

  • AboveAverageCat44
    AboveAverageCat44 2 years ago +179

    "This is the 900th day my nose has been unintentionally wetted"
    This is the kind of comedy I want.

  • _MiyuMiku_
    _MiyuMiku_ 5 years ago +2174

    "I would like to receive two rubs exactly. A third one and I will bite the shit out of them as protocol."😂

  • Nimay Ndolo
    Nimay Ndolo 2 years ago +276

    “Like Sisyphus, I am bound to hell,” I SCREAMED 😂😂😂

    • Diana Man
      Diana Man Year ago +6

      @No Record actually, if someone quote that line is because they know about it... Quite simple.

    • Jacob Medina
      Jacob Medina Year ago +7

      @No Record the Greeks punished Sisyphus by having him push a Boulder up a hill only to roll back down. Don’t assume people are dumb.

    • Hitman Hydraulics
      Hitman Hydraulics Year ago +1

      I did too, fkn tears flew!

  • Lexa
    Lexa Month ago +4

    "The authorities have closed the door... I can only assume that they have forgotten about me and left me here to die..."
    So dramatic... and so accurate. 🤣

  • Jami Lynn
    Jami Lynn Year ago +91

    "Dear diary - I attempted to smother one of my captors by draping my body around his neck while he was sleeping, but he just praised me for being "cuddly". I will try again when he falls asleep after a heavy meal."

  • Drew Soraci
    Drew Soraci 3 years ago +53

    2019 and this is still one of my absolute favorite videos.

  • Manga Entertainment
    Manga Entertainment 8 years ago +3117

    I almost feel bad.

    • Piyush_D
      Piyush_D 3 years ago +2

      Me too, I hope the authority answer their questions

    • THE KuKluxFags
      THE KuKluxFags 3 years ago

      @John Smith be a multi million dollar like manga entertainment

    • Rhonda Crute
      Rhonda Crute 4 years ago

      Really.. about what

    • Kirsten Yabuku
      Kirsten Yabuku 4 years ago

      Manga Entertainment I

    • Tony Vanatta
      Tony Vanatta 4 years ago

      Manga Entertainment q

  • Just A girl
    Just A girl Year ago +4

    I found this like 7 or 8 yrs ago. I still come back to watch it too many times in of row.. This video will live rent free in my head till I die. 😂😂😂

  • Trevor Shuff
    Trevor Shuff 2 years ago +22

    Love the part where he is saying “the squirrel is back again, it mocks me”. 😂

  • -
    - Year ago +3

    We REALLY need more of these! PLEASE make more. They are so hilariously true and that voice just emphasizes how ridiculous cats can be 😂 Well there’s a dog one too. It’s just as hilarious lol

  • Jennifer Churchill
    Jennifer Churchill 6 months ago +3

    This was absolutely hilarious! Thank you so much for the laughter, when I needed it the most! Please make more similar to this! The voice is perfect!! Have a great day!

  • Alex Burnett
    Alex Burnett 8 years ago +333

    Dear Diary, I have been standing outside the authorities bedroom door for nearly 3 hours now, pawing ever so greatly and meowing quite loudly. The only result thus far is several loud screams, though I can not understand this primitive language, I can only assume it is cheering me on. I will continue to paw at the door.

    • Crazybabycreeper
      Crazybabycreeper 7 years ago +5

      Dear diary , my owners have left me outside for 5 minutes now I scratch and sing but they're not replying all I hear is very intense screams and shaking of the bed they must be cheering me on

    • Evil Betty
      Evil Betty 8 years ago +6

      @Rene Thurston And that's the REAL reason cat ladies don't have children.

    • Rene
      Rene 8 years ago +7

      SO MUCH YES! Nothing sexier than having a foil ball fly under the door and then constant meowing for someone to hit it back. Then when you open the door, the two cats want to come in and investigate what could have POSSIBLY been going on.

    • lola wright
      lola wright 8 years ago +4

      lol so true.

  • Chuy
    Chuy Year ago +26

    These are better than the ASPCA commercials at making me want to adopt a cat.

    • Kalvon
      Kalvon 10 months ago +2

      😂 Damn you're right, now that I think of it.

  • Molly Anne
    Molly Anne 2 years ago +36

    “Half of love is just lo, and that’s just how I feel” OH GOLLY, I FELT THAT.

  • Kpop vs This Life
    Kpop vs This Life Year ago +35

    "Sing the song of my people" took me out LOL
    And the part about waiting for the laptop to be in use to sit on the keyboard loll

  • Atlas
    Atlas 2 years ago +10

    These are all injustices that NEED to be addressed!
    Thank you zefrank for sharing these atrocities against the felines to the public

  • ele phanty
    ele phanty 2 years ago +8

    "Dear Diary, the squirrel was back again today. it mocks me."
    I love this whole video, but that part got me laughing good.

  • Frederick Wilson
    Frederick Wilson Year ago +11

    "My food bowl is now only half-full, I am convinced that I will soon starve"
    "I will stand at my post, and sing the song of my people"
    YEP, that's my cat alright. LOL

  • GloryGlory Hole’allelujah

    Almost a decade later…and this still makes me laugh til I cry. 🤣❤️

  • jlastre
    jlastre 2 years ago +161

    “Like Sisyphus I am bound to hell.” I laughed like only someone who studied the classics for four year in HS could upon hearing that.

    • tetsujin86
      tetsujin86 2 years ago +16

      I haven't studied the classics for four years, but as a postal worker, I too, laughed.
      It was bittersweet. A balm to the raw edge of my jagged spirit.

    • Redshirt Veteran
      Redshirt Veteran 2 years ago +18

      Yeah, taking classes like that can be like pushing a boulder uphill. Someone should write about a guy doing that, it'll be a great metaphor for life.

  • Ana Lopes
    Ana Lopes 9 months ago +2

    Eight years later, thins still makes me laugh until I cry!

  • DarkSun Wavelength
    DarkSun Wavelength 3 years ago +14

    This never gets old.

  • DNAsGhostzHouze
    DNAsGhostzHouze Year ago +6

    This is quite possibly one of the funniest things I've seen on youtube to date. Bravo sir.

  • Arcadia Occult Curio Shop
    Arcadia Occult Curio Shop 2 years ago +55

    The one and only time I closed the bedroom door my newly adopted tortoiseshell decided to climb up onto the stove somehow turn the knobs and tried to burn the building down!
    I love her dearly she's my little skinny mini Butterbean but I continue to live in fear... 😰

    • nostalkingzone
      nostalkingzone 9 months ago +1

      I know just how you feel. Reminds me of the time (almost twenty years ago now) our (then) two tiny kittens were being kept in our upstairs bathroom while we were away on a business trip (we had an elderly cat; and the kittens hadn't been with us long enough to know how she might get along with them with no one at home). My sister was dropping in to feed and care for them. However, the little youngest girl kitten (we presume it was) decided she was going to get out of that room by hook or by crook! Apparently, she must've jumped up the inside of the standing shower stall, caught the faucet handles and accidentally turned the water on... because after we'd arrived at our destination, we'd received an email from my sister entitled, "MONSTER KITTIES!!" Yep--the water had flowed out of the shower stall, onto the bathroom floor and partly out into the hallway, ack. Good thing my sis (and bro-in-law) stopped by to check on them when they did! She was pretty much a mischief-maker all her life, until she passed about three years ago this summer. I really miss all of them.

    • Arcadia Occult Curio Shop
      Arcadia Occult Curio Shop Year ago +1

      @- 😆👍

    • -
      - Year ago +1

      Arcadia Occult Curio Shop Autumn Storm Hp hahaha! Mine like to stare me down too as if they are in the act of plotting 😂

    • Arcadia Occult Curio Shop
      Arcadia Occult Curio Shop Year ago +3

      @- You know! I told my family if they find me chopped up in the freezer don't believe the su*cide note it was Rose!
      She's reminds me of a capuchin monkey she's always got a scheme cooking in her head.
      Years ago we had a stray kitten we named gypsy it was a very appropriate name one time we move the couch there's a pile of silver and gold jewelry we had "lost" the cat had a stash!?!

    • -
      - Year ago +2

      Arcadia Occult Curio Shop Autumn Storm Hp stealthy assassins 🤣

  • Aaron Hersey
    Aaron Hersey 6 years ago +486

    No matter how many times I watch this it is still funny.

    • The Guy From Walgreens
      The Guy From Walgreens 20 days ago

      It always brings a smile to my face as well.

    • Shanda E
      Shanda E 5 months ago

      Same here 🐈🐈‍⬛

    • ThatClassic70sGirl
      ThatClassic70sGirl 6 months ago

      @Sim Evans Probably why it has over 30 million views.

    • Sim Evans
      Sim Evans 3 years ago +2

      Yes. And no matter over how many years

    • Puks Punni
      Puks Punni 3 years ago +2

      You think this is funny? YOU MONSTER!

  • D Shepherd
    D Shepherd 3 days ago

    “Half of love is just lo, & that’s how I feel.”
    And here I am, watching again & laughing so hard, my guts hurt.

  • Jim Hall
    Jim Hall 3 years ago +17

    Oh my God inside or outside inside or outside... That is so true- that is exactly how they act! LOL

    • nostalkingzone
      nostalkingzone 9 months ago +1

      He should've repeated it at least once more, and then faded out... that would've been PERFECT!! :D

  • TheBereangirl
    TheBereangirl 2 years ago +8 husband and I were laughing so hard...I was going to throw up and passed out, I told him to STOP, he paused it so we could must have been what wearing the tickle belt was like for Man Ray.😏😂😂😂

  • Gry Ranfelt
    Gry Ranfelt 2 years ago +11

    "My spirit is breaking" XD Omg, this is so brilliant.

  • IsabelleMourning
    IsabelleMourning 6 months ago +2

    My teacher sent this to me bc I'm feeling extremely low. This is just awesome.

  • Misplaced Pawn
    Misplaced Pawn 3 years ago +24

    I wish I read their diary sooner... 😔
    The struggle is real

    • Stephan Ginther
      Stephan Ginther 2 years ago +4

      They just have it so terrible...a moment of silence please......

  • ICES
    ICES 11 months ago +1

    I sure needed a laugh!!!This was awesome!!!❤🧡💛💚💙💜

  • Mikay
    Mikay 2 years ago +6

    I can totally relate with the cats going over on the keyboard whenever I’m using them 😂

  • tamsinthai
    tamsinthai 6 years ago +5522

    Dogs have owners. Cats have staff.

    • KP 762
      KP 762 3 months ago

      You don't train a cat; The cat trains you.

    • Honza Řehák
      Honza Řehák 8 months ago

      It really depends. My grandfather was the god for his cats. And grandma was a staff. So behaviour of my grandpa is my paramount of how to co-live with cats

    • ahleena
      ahleena 11 months ago

      Depends on if the humans are doing what the cat wants.

    • SPYDERcat
      SPYDERcat 2 years ago

      @cluhrinse ...I stand corrected...I said "hoomane slaves".

    • Nina
      Nina 2 years ago

      tamsinthai lol yep

  • Marcia Palmer
    Marcia Palmer Year ago

    Having had two cats for 17 years, I can totally relate to this poor kitty's dilemma. Its even more hilarious with two working in tandem. They provided so much love and hilarity to my life that when they passed, I was really sad. I miss them still, but now have a cute little 15 lb dog who is fast filling that void. Its awesome how pets can provide so much comfort, love and affection in one's life.

  • Desert Dweller
    Desert Dweller 7 months ago +1

    The garden door part with the "to go outside, inside, outside or inside" is PERFECT! 😂🤣

  • Max Oakland
    Max Oakland Year ago +2

    I found this so much funnier than I ever imagined I would

  • MaryLou Sherman
    MaryLou Sherman 2 years ago

    This reminds me of 'Henri', the long-haired Tuxedo cat who lamented his life condition a few years ago..."I am surrounded by morons"...
    As one who lives to serve I find these diary entries very accurate....especially the food bowl only half full and the panic of starving to death. I get reminded of this every day.

  • Nick Taylor
    Nick Taylor 2 years ago +10

    Need a Covid 19 version of both cat and dog videos. Somehow, the cats will be sadder and dogs will be happier.

  • deborahcabness
    deborahcabness 3 years ago

    This was hilarious!!! Thanks so much for the laughs! We have a kitty and can only imagine her thoughts about what goes on here with the "authorities"! :)

  • The_Most_Stable_Alkene

    Tbh, zefrank is the best thing to come out of buzzfeed, like how did such a god amongst humans come out of such a cesspool

  • Hallands
    Hallands 3 years ago +15

    Oh, the tribulations, the indignities, the utter injustice of it all! And to add insult to injury, I'm burdened with nine such lives...

  • StrayJello
    StrayJello 6 years ago +1595

    Dear diary,
    The red dot has appeared again. It moves faster than I can imagine and seems to move unheeded across all surfaces.
    Despite the last 54 attempts, I will once again ruthlessly chase after it.
    It does not seem to be able to be caught, and disappears at will.
    Wish me luck.

    • Tyler
      Tyler 3 months ago +1

      @when you take the time to scroll through the comments, read them, and then comment what you did. Lol thanks when

    • Jeremy Crabb
      Jeremy Crabb 2 years ago

      My cat just stalks it

    • Melanie Anderson
      Melanie Anderson 3 years ago +11

      This is not in the video lol

    • Goth Sans
      Goth Sans 3 years ago +3

      Luck is wished

  • E S
    E S 11 months ago +1

    I’m so glad you got put in my recommendations. I’ve been binge watching and have to stop ✋ now as my sides are hurting from so much laughing. I have subscribed and look forward to notifications of new ones.

  • Niki Iannarone
    Niki Iannarone 2 years ago

    I laughed so hard I cried.. This was fantastic! I'm SO happy I stumbled upon ur channel a few months ago.. They're all great, but this is GOLD!

  • Goabnb94
    Goabnb94 2 years ago +95

    "Exactly 2 belly rubs. 3 and I will bite the shit out of their hand, as per protocol."

  • pinkfoxros
    pinkfoxros 2 years ago +34

    My cats diary: “Dear Diary, I crapped in the food bowl, the human has refused to put food in it so I killed a beautiful bird and ripped its freaking butt out to present as tribute for food. It didn’t work. So I attempted to climb a tree, I failed, not at climbing the tree, but getting down. I screamed for at least 3 minutes. My human has come to get me, so I bit the shit out of him and smacked him for attempting to save me.”

  • FreeForLife
    FreeForLife 5 months ago

    So Hilarious! Can't stop laughing! This sounds exactly like my cat -- even the squirrel thing.

  • Francis Turl
    Francis Turl 2 years ago

    I am hopelessly in love ....not to mention being warmly validated by the sweetnes described here
    about our wonderful pets esp.our Cats.

  • Lovable Sole
    Lovable Sole Year ago +3

    Dear Diary, I will continue to nibble on my servants (the human) arm and stare unflinchingly at her until she gets up and feeds me, just so I can take two bites and walk away as a reminder to her who is really in charge here 😆😆😆.
    I loved this!

  • Karri Compton
    Karri Compton Year ago +2

    Those are exactly my cats’ thoughts at 3am after I’ve locked them out of the bedroom.

  • MTL713
    MTL713 Year ago

    I laughed so hard I cried when I first saw it seven years ago and I still did when I saw it today! He's obviously a cat owner because this perfectly describes the way cats behave! 😹🤣😂

  • Tim Richardson
    Tim Richardson 2 years ago +2

    I laughed so hard at these especially the bite the shit out of you one! You have to resurrect this and do more!

  • Rhys Rigsby
    Rhys Rigsby 8 months ago +1

    Need more of this... this is so awesome.

  • Bobbi Anderson
    Bobbi Anderson 2 years ago

    Any day I am low and feeling, I am losing the day to just life, I watch this and always feel better. Thank you!

  • Ryan
    Ryan 3 years ago +5374

    Dear diary: I eat my food so fast that I forget I ate. I must immediately try to eat my brothers food so I don't starve to death.

    • medexamtoolsdotcom
      medexamtoolsdotcom Year ago +2

      Dear diary: the authorities have provided me with a bowl full of inedible substance, as if it is valid food. It would have been valid food, but I have grown tired of it after 5 minutes and after eating 5 percent of it. I shouldn't have to eat food that has been drying out for 5 minutes or more, just because I spent the first 5 minutes complaining about it when it was first opened. The authorities are cruel and abusive monsters.

      ME DA QUEEN UwU Year ago

      @سيسم العبيدي انا عربية (✧◡✧)

    • Drizz
      Drizz Year ago


    • Compost Chicken Queens Plus
      Compost Chicken Queens Plus Year ago

      ...and then puke up both portions on the expensive, hard to clean antique rug...

    • dweever
      dweever Year ago +2

      We have a double dish for our two cats. Cat2 always puts his paw in Cat1's dish while he eats for dominance. XD

  • Cre8tvMG
    Cre8tvMG Year ago +2

    This is genius. I listen every year just because it is perfect.

  • rustismycrack
    rustismycrack Year ago

    I remember seeing this 8 years ago... time sure goes flying

  • Dagmar Caletkova
    Dagmar Caletkova 2 years ago +1

    As a cat owner I confirm that this video is just hilarious and sadly also true😁

  • medicineman360
    medicineman360 2 years ago +491

    Fall 2019: *May we suggest, to you, this video*
    Me: Joke is in you, algorithm. This one has been saved in my favorites, since 2013.

  • Elias Guerra
    Elias Guerra 5 years ago +209

    "I would like to receive two rubs exactly. A third one and I will bite the shit out of them as per protocol" Lol'd so hard 😂 😂 😂 😂

    • Shanda E
      Shanda E 5 months ago

      This is true, my friends cat did this every time. 😂

    • nostalkingzone
      nostalkingzone 9 months ago

      And it's so true! (or at least, most of the time), lol.

    • bingo983
      bingo983 4 years ago +1

      Elias Guerra That one made me burst out with laughter. 😂😂

  • Tiger74147
    Tiger74147 10 months ago +1

    The "two rubs exactly" one really got me laughing.

  • ahleena
    ahleena 11 months ago +1

    We need more of these, please.

  • Amelie eq
    Amelie eq 3 years ago

    I love this! I watch this over and over and never get bored!

  • Canuckmom1958
    Canuckmom1958 2 years ago

    Oh my GOD...I am practically peeing my pants, watching this. It's like a conglomerate of all the Cats I have spent quality time with - but that voice...absolutely PERFECT for what goes on inside a Cats head. I nominate Janeane Garofolo for the Girl Cat voice. Perfect !

  • Maddy Smith
    Maddy Smith 5 years ago +4489

    My bowl is now half way full, soon I will starve to death.

    • Jan Koza
      Jan Koza Year ago +2

      You’ve met my cat!

    • RGMerkel
      RGMerkel Year ago +1

      My butt hole cat every damn time lol

    • ElysianFeilds93
      ElysianFeilds93 Year ago +1

      @Alecia Star that's good to know. I will keep that in mind next time I get a kitty. 🐈

    • Isaac Schilling
      Isaac Schilling 2 years ago

      Why are you hot for no reason?

    • tomstonemale
      tomstonemale 2 years ago +2

      Shit, my cats don't eat their food unless is fresh out of the bag and the two of them have to watch me filling their bowls. Otherwise, they skip their meal and then pester me to fill the bowl again.

  • Darth_ Dub_
    Darth_ Dub_ Year ago

    Wow! That hurt trying not to laugh with my son asleep in the next room.
    Great video!

  • Marius Cristian Onit
    Marius Cristian Onit 2 years ago

    Excelent storytelling, and also funny as hell!

  • TimeforThinkers
    TimeforThinkers 2 years ago

    Having been the owner of numerous cats over the years, 22 at present, this is entirely accurate for the vast majority of cats I have known. The human making this video has 'em figured out for sure. HILARIOUS because it is so true!

  • Debra Torres-Reyes
    Debra Torres-Reyes 2 years ago +1

    OMG...what a wonderful way to start my Monday morning. Laughter is good for the soul. Thank you🤣🤣🤣

  • Mary Faulds
    Mary Faulds Year ago

    I am so happy that this was posted on my birthday. It’s a blessing and I have watched it so many times

  • Grub
    Grub 6 months ago

    As an owner of two cats, this was waaaaaay too accurate

  • barbara avina
    barbara avina 2 months ago

    This is some of the funniest stuff I've seen lately! And, man! Did I ever need a good laugh! Thank you.

  • Steve Sorrell
    Steve Sorrell 3 years ago +1

    And still, the greatest video ever!!!
    Causes me physical pain, and I love it 😹

  • Suzanne Carter
    Suzanne Carter 2 years ago

    I have7 cats and watch this every night so I go to sleep giggling. The narrator’s voice and inflections are absolutely perfect!

  • robynsnest22
    robynsnest22 Month ago

    Love your voice with this as well as the True Facts. It just adds so much to the videos.

  • phnxflwr
    phnxflwr 2 years ago

    This never gets old 😂

  • David Stevens
    David Stevens Year ago

    This video, though it stresses that the cat feels it's being ignored, always makes me laugh. I have had about 13 cats in my life and I am always amazed at the differences between their being ignored and my wishing to be alone for a bit. Why can my cats be alone but I can't?